Friday, September 16, 2011

Marriage Doesn't Fix Problems

There’s nothing inherently natural about marriage. It doesn’t obey any laws of physics or cosmic order. Nor is it divinely ordained, or biologically inevitable.

It’s a cultural construct, useful for parenting, ancestral pedigrees and financial legacy. The scenario for how this coupling plays out depends on where we live.

In Western societies, we have choices about whom to marry and how to marry them. But there is only one truth that applies to them all. Immediately upon saying ‘I Do’, two people become one legal and financial unit – an official event that is recorded at the court house.

The government doesn’t care if our marriage is happy or not. The government tracks us, not to send us an anniversary card, but to collect its share of taxes. We’re a financial entity until one of three events happens – annulment, divorce or death.

So before you marry, keep in mind:


Marriage doesn't fix problems; it just makes them permanent. If you can't talk about money before marriage, it doesn't get any easier afterward.


It’s easier to get in than to get out. 


Whatever your spouse is doing, you’re doing it too, whether you know about it or not. 


Going into marriage, it’s all about love. Coming out of marriage, it’s all about money. 


Romance offers no protection. Financial intimacy does.

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